all is lost... the darkness sets in and consumes. it coats you like a blanket, a tall cloaked figure holding you close as a mother holding her child. it grows cold, the shudder running up your spine is the only sensation as everything seems to grow further and further away. Why god do we feel the need for closeness.. connection to others is the source of all happiness and all pain.. who needs to be happy when you feel no pain.. those you love turn away, they cannot understand, they refuse to.. though they preech and pray asking you to spill your soul, they cannot understand that there is nothing left to be spilt. when their flimsy methods fail, they too turn to anger, because closeness to you has brought them pain.. you are a pain to all, and all is painfull. therefore nothing is better.. let the emptiness consume you and feel nothing. the demons whisper carefully in your ear, guiding you for their own whims and amusement. see how they laugh, clinging to your shoulders like miniscule gargoyles giggling at a perverted joke. you are a joke, so meaningless yet still you are of some use.. you are now a marrionette, flailing your limbs helplessly as all the laughter is drowned out by the tide within your mind, the empty beach with not but an ebbe and flow of black water, against black sand. you hear the creek of chains, the drip drip drip of blood.. you see the air in front of you as you exhale, fleeing from your body like rats from a ship. You lay there, on a cold concrete floor, broken, bleeding, too weak to cry or call for help.. surrounded by the hanging corpses of beasts that have been skinned and left to rot. it's so cold.. so cold... why do you feel this way, why do you feel at all? because you love, because you care.. pain is your reward.. the ones you love will always look away.. look away when you call, silently crying for presence, for companionship.. yet you are nothing to them.. they do not see you.. you are nothing.. nothing...